Crap, Why is My Name on My Christmas Shopping List Multiple Times?

Sometimes I am really good at setting goals for myself and achieving them, and sometimes I would have to give myself a big fat F. This month I get an F. December has been a particularly pricey month for me. I flew across country for a wedding, had to buy a shit ton of Christmas gifts, and of course the dreaded law school student loans kicked in. BTW the monthly loan amount adjusted to an “income based” payment is still almost the cost of my monthly rent. Naturally I told myself that I would not buy anything for myself this month because, of course, I don’t need anything. I have enough clothes to dress every woman my size in all of the Philippines. I started off strong the first week, and then of course, I faltered. It is really easy to be on a shopping diet when you avoid the stores, but when you have to put yourself out there to buy gifts for other people, it is really easy to drift into the mode where you just start shopping for yourself.

I feel like I am in confession without the priest right now, but I am hoping that spilling my guts about my lack of discipline will help everyone out there with the same illness (self-diagnosed obsessive compulsive shopping, materialism, and fashion addiction) feel a little bit better. It all started the first week of December when I went to watch a soccer game at a bar. I thought that I was safe for the entire duration of the game because I was in an English pub with beer and televisions and there was pretty much nothing in sight that I could possibly buy for myself. Then half time hit. I wandered outside of the pub and found the most charming little boutique across the street. It was like a lighthouse in the middle of a desolate, rocky shore. The outdoor sale rack called out to me and compelled me to jay-walk, actually jay-run across four lanes of LA street traffic to look at its wares. I couldn’t resist. When I reached the door of the boutique and heard the festive bells on the doorknob jingle as I entered, I felt safe and happy. I was home at last, away from the soccer pub and in my element where I belonged. Before halftime was over, I walked away with the cutest pair of black pants.

How could I possibly have justified this purchase? I was supposed to be buying stuff for other people. I could have walked out of there with something for my sister, my mom, my aunt, my girl cousins, but I didn’t. I justified the buy by telling myself that I needed the pants (I actually still believe I need the pants even though two weeks have passed and I haven’t worn them yet). Since it has been so cold the past few weeks I have only been wearing pants to work and I noticed that my black pants have gotten a bit big. I did buy them at least five years ago and they either stretched out, or looser pants were cooler then, or I lost weight? Either way, I really needed new pants, especially a new style of black pants. In this magical little boutique I found the perfect pair of black pants that have that genie-in-a-bottle, yet still work appropriate shape where they have some volume on top but taper with a cuff at the ankle. They have a bow at the waste (which means I don’t have to search for a belt) giving the pants a feminine look. The pants look great with sexy strappy shoes or a pair of classic platform pumps and can easily transition from daytime meeting to happy hour. Don’t you see why I needed these pants?

I wish I could say that this was the only time I broke my December diet, but since then I also purchased a pair of blue suede heels, two work shirts (also much needed because I lack work shirts with sleeves and I was at an outlet in a state where sales tax was 4% lower than in California), and two lace tops (one with sleeves and one without, might I add that they are completely different “looks” and colors). So I felt a bit guilty about buying not one, but two lace tops, so I decided to give one as a gift to someone who will love and appreciate it as much as I do. And she happens to be the same size as me. Oh, and last night I bought a leopard print coat because it fit so well (which is really hard to find for someone with narrow shoulders and petite arms). The coat was a must buy because it was on sale from $99 to $29 which practically made it free, and I told myself that I would return the other lace top if I bought the jacket, which I have yet to do, but will for sure do. These are just the things that I bought for myself that I can think of off the top of my head and there are still over 10 days left till the end of this month. Perhaps I should set more realistic goals for myself next December. I sincerely hope your holiday shopping is focused on the spirit of giving to other people—apparently I was absent on that day of Sunday school.

What to Wear When You Are Feeling Blue

Clothing has always been very therapeutic for me. My mom always told me that when you are sick you should wear a cashmere scarf and that if you buy cheap shoes that make your feet hurt, your whole body hurts. These are not mere old wives tales; the woman speaks the truth. So when I was feeling blue I took my own take on her words of wisdom.

Last week I was feeling so bummed I didn’t know what to do with myself. I tried everything to cheer myself up. I took time cooking a gourmet dinner at home, I played tennis with the ultimate goal of hitting the ball as hard as I could, and I spent all my commute time talking on the phone to my oldest, dearest friends, but I still couldn’t kick the blues. Perhaps it was post-vacation blues or pre-holiday blues? I know the blues came off a fabulously fun weekend where I saw virtually all my closest friends. I had this moment when I realized that I would spend the rest of my life on the opposite side of the country from them. New friends are great, but you can’t make old friends. When I couldn’t make my sadness go away so I decided to try something new. I thought to myself, “Self, what is my favorite part of the day?” I replied, “Getting dressed in the morning of course!” So I decided to make a game of it—for every day of the week that I was feeling blue, I would wear something blue. According to the rules of the game, jeans didn’t count as a blue clothing item. The challenge began on my third day of ultimate sadness, and I must admit, it actually made me feel better. It even made me feel better than petting my dog. I’m no doctor, but I think if you have a serious fashion habit, this could be a medical breakthrough for depression.

Day 1 of Sadness: On my first day of sadness I wanted to wear a pair of comfy jeans, but it was Wednesday and I try only to wear jeans on Friday, so I had to improvise. Instead I wore a pair of electric blue pants and paired it with an off-white long sleeve blouse and a black blazer. Since the pants were so incredibly loud I created one of my signature “office mullet” looks—business on top, party on the bottom. It was the kind of outfit that looks very professional when you are sitting at your desk and no one can see your bottom half.

Day 2 of Sadness: On my second day of feeling blue I was going for a classic, androgynous look. I paired brown work pants with a navy Marc Jacobs vest that has the most delightfully preppy neck bow and gold buttons. Because the bow at the neck is so voluminous, I pulled my hair back. In order to avoid looking too mannish, I accented my face with a strong, red lip and wore feminine, patent-leather nude pumps. I think this look was a winner for when I feel either happy or sad.

Day 3 of Sadness: On the third day of sadness I was feeling a little bit better so I threw on a bright blue winter coat over an all-black ensemble. This wasn’t my most creative of moments, but it does follow one of my cardinal rules which is to throw a splash of color into any monochromatic outfit.

Whether it is the holidays or something else that is making you feel blue, I hope that something wearable in the sky blue to navy range will provide a great pick-me-up!

What to Wear When You Travel Anywhere

Last weekend I attended the most fun wedding on earth. It was probably more fun than the wedding where Jesus turned water into wine. The only not fun part about the whole weekend was schlepping myself and my bags across country on a red-eye from LA to Baltimore with a stop in Charlotte in between. I am not a fan of the red-eye, or of layovers, but being a last minute flight booker, I was stuck with both.

I do, however, need to give myself a pat on the back for my in-flight fashion. Travel fashion isn’t necessarily just about looking good when you step on and off the plane, it is much more about comfort and strategy. Here are some of my favorite travel tips that I learned over at least a decade of crazy cross-country flights:

(1) The perfect flight jacket- I love my Lulu Lemon hoodie! It is a splurge, but totally worth it because it has a deep hood that allows you to throw it over your head and eyes for sleeping and/or avoiding talking to the person next to you. It is also much thicker than your average sweater and is tailored to fit the contour of your body. I am convinced that it is the only sweatshirt that won’t make you look frumpy. Another great feature is the fact that it has thumbholes to keep your hands warm, but your digits free. They really did think of everything!

(2) Jeggings- I generally want to vomit when I see travelers wearing printed pajama pants, even on a red-eye. This is not acceptable if you are old enough to walk. Jeggings are a great alternative because they look just like jeans, but feel like you are wearing stretch pants. I paired mine with a pair of tall boots (mainly because it was easier to wear them rather than to pack them). Make sure if you do choose the boot and jegging combo your boots are easy to slip off otherwise the security screening will be more awkward than it already is (think body scanner getting an up close and personal look at your goodies).

(3) The fancy t-shirt- Once again in the spirit of looking like I am wearing normal clothes, but in reality being much more comfortable, I love to wear long, thin t-shirts that don’t really look like t-shirts at all. Specifically, I have this jersey cotton top that is long (so it covers my jegging ass), but it is totally soft. It has a lace short sleeve to turn things up a notch. It really is the type of travel look where you can get right off the plane and not feel totally embarrassed about grabbing a bite to eat before showering or changing.

(4) The GIANT scarf- I have this great scarf from H&M that is attached at both ends like a circle. It is great because the entire thing is as big as a blanket which comes in handy if you are flying coach where blankets and pillows are a rare thing these days. It is great because I can just stuff it in my carryon or wear it around my neck (double wrapped) when my carryon gets too full.

These are by far my travel essentials, but I also like to get on board with a pair of earplugs which serve two purposes (1) to let people near me know I am not interested in talking to them and (2) to block the crazy loudness of the airplane and the children that scream when their ears pop. I also make sure to pack a pair of flip-flops in my carryon if my destination is a warm weather place because I hate when my feet are either too hot or too cold. Apparently they are more temperamental than I am. I also throw in a toothbrush and my makeup bag. I always bring my makeup bag in my carryon because having to replace all that stuff if it gets lost with your luggage can get really expensive. It is particularly essential for me because I have no real eyebrows (as part of my Asian hairlessness) and while sleeping with my hood on during the flight I tend to rub my penciled eyebrows off leaving me with either one eyebrow or two half eyebrows. Because of my potentially awkward eyebrow situation, you can see why I always carry my makeup bag with me.

Happy holiday travels my fashion-minded friends! May this Christmas bring you joy and great clothes!